Monday, January 22, 2018

Our Final Day

Yesterday was our last meeting with our sweet Miss May. The day began with breakfast as usual, then the boys headed back up to our room and I headed down to the bookstore in the mall attached to our hotel. I still hadn't gotten books with characters from Korea for Maylee. I found several fairy tale books and picked out a few. Then I found one that shows the main character, a little girl, who shows many characteristics as compared to animals. Although the whole book is in Hangul, I was able to get the gist and loved the message.

Finally, when we all went to the bookstore many days ago, Joe had found an toy that says the Korean alphabet, numbers, songs, and sayings and then also has all of these in English. I got this as well, knowing that it will be so nice for Maylee to hear words that she understands when she comes home, and will also be able to hear the same things in English to help learn our language quicker. The boys (of course) noticed a poop symbol on the top of the toy. This plays a song in Korean, complete with fart noises. I'm already done listening to it.

After hanging out in our room for a bit, we decided to head to Holt early. We wanted to make another visit to HomePlus, a store similar to Fred Meyers. We shopped for snacks to bring to our meeting and some for our flight home. Maylee LOVES snacks! Food is definitely the way to our girl's heart, so we felt as though they were essential to our visit.

We headed up to our meeting room a bit early and Maylee was already there. Before we had even gotten into the door, FM was excitedly handing us photo album, after photo album. We settled in and started looking through them. So many photos of our girl growing up! Although we wanted to pour through every page, we also desperately wanted to interact with our girl as much as we could in our short time together, so we ripped ourselves away from the photos and began playing and talking to our sweet girl.

This was our first meeting with Foster Dad and Maylee's foster sister and it was so fun to watch the whole family interact with one another. I love the bond that our daughter shares with her sister and it breaks my heart that so so soon they will be separated. I hope with all my heart that we can continue their bond in years to come. I opted to take a lot of videos at this meeting, hoping that they will help our hearts be patient for the wait to come.

This meeting was even better than the last two. Maylee is still not okay with us holding her or hugging her without initiating, but she was happier and more at ease with us- laughing and playing and singing and dancing the whole time. She continued to call Joe appa and my mommy. She gave the boys big big hugs and interacted with them more than in our previous meetings.

Our girl has sass and I love it. She is so independent and smart and funny and adorable and she knows what she wants and has no problem telling you so. She loves to pretend she is putting on makeup, stacking blocks, and sharing with her sister. She has the best smile, which warms our hearts, as we have not seen many happy faces in past pictures. But she does smile all the time and it is the best.

During our meeting last Wednesday, FM had asked that we bring Maylee some new shoes. We found a couple of pairs throughout our market visits, but they ended up still being too small. We decided to give them to her foster family for their next foster children- they are already preparing for a new little one after Maylee and her sister come home, so they were very happy to have them. We made a plan to run to Namdaemun Market after our meeting to get new, bigger shoes and then would drop them off at Holt, to be given to Maylee the next day.

Because Joe and the boys will not be coming on the custody trip, we decided to give our big gifts to FM and FD this time. We gave Maylee's FM a locket that matches one I have. We took some pictures during our meetings, which we will put into the lockets. We gave FD an engraved pocket watch that matches one that Joe has. It says Maylee's name, birth date, and "Always thankful Forever Family". They were both so thankful for their gifts. Foster Mom said several times throughout our meeting, "We are family now!" and we are. They will always be our family, They will always be in our lives.

Our meeting came to an end so much faster than we would have liked. Everyone seemed so sad for it to end. FM and FD left as slowly as they could, we did too. Trying so hard to stretch every last second as long as it could go. We stayed behind in the room a few minutes longer to clean up and pack our things. When we left the room, gave the Holt Korea staff hugs and said our goodbyes, we headed to the elevator. Who was still in the hall waiting for us? Our family's other half! We rode the elevator together, sharing our final seconds. When it was time for us to go, Maylee waved her tiny hand and blew us kisses.

Leaving her is so so hard. Harder still with the passing minutes. And we know she is loved and cared for. We know she will be happy and safe. We know that these final weeks with her foster family are essential and special, just our final weeks of a family of four will be essential and special. We know she will be home with us soon and forever. These days are fleeting for all of us.

As hard as it was to leave her, having a job to do helped. We quickly headed to Namdaemun and found two new pairs of shoes. I wish I would have taken pictures of them, but they were similar to the original pairs, as I loved them so much. Instead, the Mary Jane's were a plum color and the boots were a tad different, but still pink and fleecy. It was raining hard while we were there, so we didn't stay as long as we had planned, but instead headed back to Holt. After dropping them off and having our last goodbyes with the Holt staff, we found a cab to take us back to our hotel.
Our last dinner in Korea

Once back, we headed down to the mall for our final dinner in Korea. We opted for the delicious Italian restaurant, which we had gone to a few days earlier. It's funny- we will miss so very much of what we have experienced in Korea, and an Italian restaurant in the mall will be one of them. The food is SO good!

The best gift ever!
After dinner, we headed back to our room for our final movie night and snuggles in one big bed. Before picking a movie, we poured through the photo albums given to us, finally having the time and energy to do so. I sobbed as we flipped through the photos which ranged from when Maylee was an infant all the way until now. Many were with her second foster mom and what looks to be a foster brother. My favorite photos though, are of her dol ceremony- her first birthday. Our sweet girl looks so adorable in her hanbok (traditional Korean dress), surrounded by others who celebrated with her. Although we haven't been given many photos of a smiling Maylee, many of the photos in these books show her so so happy, with that big beautiful smile we have come to love so very much.

Looking through these photos was such a blessing and so emotionally draining on our last night here. It made me long for her more than before and sad for all the moments we have missed. I am so thankful to both of Maylee's foster families for sending us such cherished gifts. We are so blessed to have them, but for Maylee they will be an invaluable connection to her roots and her memories of her first home, here in Korea. Although she is little, we hope with all our might that we can help her preserve as many of her memories here as possible and these photos will help.


We woke up today to clearest view we have seen since arriving 12 days ago. The mountains that circle this beautiful city are gorgeous and Seoul Tower has been a constant. We will miss so much of Seoul. We will miss the food, culture, people, and most of all our sweet Maylee Grace and her incredible foster family. We are the luckiest family on the planet!


We are packing up the room that has been our home for nearly two weeks. We are so excited to see our pets, our family and our friends. Although we will miss so very much of our time here, we are ready to be home. Ready to make our final preparations for our girl to come home. I am ready to wrap up my time in my classroom, sharing as much time, energy and focus as I can with my students who I miss tremendously while on leave.

We are ready to sleep in our own beds and drive and interact with others without a language barrier and make our own meals and have more clothes to chose from, than what was held in our suitcases. These may seem like silly, little things, but they matter to us today.

Maybe these are the little things that will help our hearts deal with the ocean between us and our daughter. Maybe they will distract us from the struggle we will face as the plane takes us farther, and farther away from our girl. I doubt it will, but at this point, all I can do is hope that we will fill these final weeks with so much fun and love and preparation, and continue to remember that these days are so important to our girl and those who love her here in Korea. I hope.

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