Since going back to work, my body has had a difficult time adjusting to it's new schedule. Of course, having two young boys hasn't helped. Over the summer, my body settled into it's natural schedule of being night-owlish. For months, that was fine. Yes, Nolan woke me up several times a night, and yes, Liam yanked me out of bed at the crack of dawn, but I could relax and wake up slowly. Not anymore. Now, I still want to stay up late, but my body doesn't get to wake up slowly, I don't get to pick and choose what I want to do, I can't put things off until I get a better night's sleep. How do you choose between a couple of hours of adult time, and your body's need for sleep??
We have a lot going on right now. A great deal of stressful situations are adding to the dilemma. In the last month we have sold our home, I went back to work, Liam started preschool (not the easiest transition), Nolan started daycare, we found a rental property, my husband's grandmother passed away, and we have been packing up the house frantically to be ready for our September 27th close date. None of these things are easy to do, but put them together, add a toddler, and an infant, and it's the perfect (more like, perfectly awful) storm.
All of this means, that I'm even more exhausted than a three year old and an eight month old (who refuses to sleep through the night) would warrant. And that's pretty exhausted! But it's so hard to give up my quiet evenings alone with my husband. It's the only time that I can check e-mail without interruption, pick what's on the tv, go to the bathroom alone, eat something without having to spoon-feed a munchkin most of it, and my husband and I can actually have a conversation without the normal: "mom!", "dad!", "Mama!", "Daddy!" that usually takes part. I love my evenings. The problem is, they turn into late nights without me noticing. Then I have a horrible time getting out of bed, when the boys are yelling to go downstairs. I have an even harder time getting to work and being my best while there.
What do I do? Sleep, or continue to have a few hours to recoup my sanity each night? I think I will try the sleep option tonight, as we had a LONG, busy weekend of packing, cleaning, long walks, grocery shopping, and a super-fun birthday party at a trampoline park. Also, I think I'll need all the rest I can get this week, since we move in five days! I'm hoping that I can get those quiet night-time hours back after we are settled into our new home, but I have a feeling that this will be a tough choice for years to come.