Friday, February 3, 2012

The Luminous (not bright) Side

Being part-time has been amazing for my family, my work, and myself, but there has been a few downsides too. Two weeks ago I signed a contract saying that I'm officially a part-time employee. This means that I may not be able to get my full-time status back. Being home with Liam has been such a blessing for our family in so many ways, but lately all of the drawbacks are what have been plaguing me! My husband and I have given up a great deal so that I can be, movies, resturants, date nights, a bigger/nicer house, and most importantly, our financial security.
Now I'm not saying that we can't make it with what we've got, we can- no problem. But there are things that are important to us that can't be as important anymore. Our son is, by far, more important than anything else in our lives, which is why this is all worth it. Lately I have been dwelling on all the things we can't do because of our situation. I made my decision and I know it's the right one for me and my family, and I never want to be one of those people who make choices and then complain about the consequences, so I have been working very hard to remind myself of all the good we have (now and in the future).
I don't think that these sad feelings would have surfaced, except for the fact that so many people in my life are just a bit ahead of us. I always feel like I'm trying to catch up. But that's wrong! I have things that they don't because I made choices and I have things that I will never be willing to give up and I need to learn that I can't have it all. I love my husband so much, and it makes me so sad to see the kind of pressure he is under being the "bread winner". He is already the stress-out-about-money-type and this situation could have flung him over the edge, but it didn't. He is so calm and thoughtful about everything we do, and I hope he knows how much I love that about him.
A friend recently told me, "Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not, remember that what you now have was once among the things you hoped for." and I can't thank her enough, because it's true!
I have a beautiful home, an amazing husband, the best baby boy ever, my loving pets, wonderful and supportive friends and family, and a job that I am thankful for everyday. Really? What do I have to complain about?! Nothing!

Oh ya! My next blog will be about the apple mummies!!

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