Being a parent is the greatest gift I have ever been given and I love every second of it, but I have also realized that not everything is hugs and kisses, love and happiness. Yesterday was my second Mother's Day (however, Liam was only 2 weeks old last time and I really can't remember a thing about it). So this year's Mother's Day seemed far more "real" to me. When I went to bed, I imagined suprises, love, and fun. Although the love was present, the rest was more realistic than I had imagined.
Joe and I were woken up many times that night, because Liam is teething again and couldn't sleep. If you have never been around a teething toddler, they are not quiet and are hard to make happy. Then Liam decided to wake up (for good) at about 5:30. This was not what I expected! He then hit me in the nose with the remote control and laughed when I cried out in pain. My husband made me a delicious breakfast and gave me gifts. They were not much, but we had agreed to that and the flowers that were sitting on our kitchen table and the card (that Joe never gives) was so sweet it made me cry!
The weather wasn't great so we were stuck in the house most of the day. We then went to my mom's where I helped my sister work on her senior project until Liam was so crabby that we had to leave so he could take a nap. Once home I took a relaxing bath and Joe tried to take a nap. But the second that I got comfortable and so did he, Liam woke up and Joe became the crabby one. Later that night we went to dinner with my family. This was the best part of the day! Beind surrounded by people who love me and who I love back, was a wonderful way to end the day.
So even though the day was no fairytale or cheesy commercial where the mom sleeps in and is brough breakfast in bed, gets fancy jewlery and is wisked off to get a mani pedi, who cares?! I had a real mother's day. I earned this and I am happy with it. I do have some hopes for the future, but I couldn't ask for anything more than to have an amazing husband who cares about me more than I ever thought possible, the most adorable son who everyone loves, and family and friends who make me feel good about myself, even when I find it difficult. Thank you to everyone who was a part of making my mother's day a true day about being a mom!
Monday, May 9, 2011
Monday, May 2, 2011
Purging and Gaining at the Same Time
Joe and I have been talking about our priorites a lot lately. Since getting pregnant, they have changed a lot. However, some of our actions have not changed to fit our new priorities. The major area is spending "quality" time with our son. Being a new parent is a huge change and it isn't always easy to make it as quickly and painlessly as we hope. Before Liam was born and even still today, Joe and I are TVoholics. From the time we get home, until we go to bed the TV is on. We are not always watching it, but it is on. When we are bored we turn on the TV and flip through the mindless channels until we find something "interesting enough" to watch.
We want Liam to grow up being active and feeling like we want to interact with him and sometimes we don't know if that is the message that he is getting. My beloved internet is also been named as a distration from what is truely important to us. I spend hours a day on Facebook and here on my baby blog. No matter how much I love these sites and the interactions that I have with people on them, it is no substitute for time spent with my baby boy, who is growing up far too fast.
Once we agreed that watching tv and the internet should not be as much of a priority as it is, the only solutions that seemed worthwhile was to get rid of it. When you are addicted to something, the best way to quit is cold turkey. Because of this, we have canceled internet, cable, and our home phone hoping that this will enhance our lives by refocusing our goals, lives, and actions. This is also perfect timing for us to make this kind of decision as there has been a lot of stress associated with my online social interactions lately and we could always save some money here and there.
I'm extremely nervous about this, which tells me that it is the right thing for us to do. When you fear not being able to spend hours staring at a screen (either one), then your daily life may need a boost. I thought this morning about the idea that when I look back on my life, I won't say that my best memories were watching CSI or posting a meaningless comment on Twitter, so why should I let those things take up so many of my hours?! I may be back soon, but I hope not. I hope that this is a learning/growing experience for our whole family and that it brings us memories, better relationships, and more moolah in the bank account.
I really hope it isn't as bad as I think it will be!
We want Liam to grow up being active and feeling like we want to interact with him and sometimes we don't know if that is the message that he is getting. My beloved internet is also been named as a distration from what is truely important to us. I spend hours a day on Facebook and here on my baby blog. No matter how much I love these sites and the interactions that I have with people on them, it is no substitute for time spent with my baby boy, who is growing up far too fast.
Once we agreed that watching tv and the internet should not be as much of a priority as it is, the only solutions that seemed worthwhile was to get rid of it. When you are addicted to something, the best way to quit is cold turkey. Because of this, we have canceled internet, cable, and our home phone hoping that this will enhance our lives by refocusing our goals, lives, and actions. This is also perfect timing for us to make this kind of decision as there has been a lot of stress associated with my online social interactions lately and we could always save some money here and there.
I'm extremely nervous about this, which tells me that it is the right thing for us to do. When you fear not being able to spend hours staring at a screen (either one), then your daily life may need a boost. I thought this morning about the idea that when I look back on my life, I won't say that my best memories were watching CSI or posting a meaningless comment on Twitter, so why should I let those things take up so many of my hours?! I may be back soon, but I hope not. I hope that this is a learning/growing experience for our whole family and that it brings us memories, better relationships, and more moolah in the bank account.
I really hope it isn't as bad as I think it will be!
Sunday, May 1, 2011
Itchy Eyes and a Healthy Diet
Liam had allergy testing last week to see if there are foods as well as other allergens that he should stay away from. I was not suprised to find that he is allergic to something, but I was surprised to find that it is eggs. I'm allergic to almost anything in nature (except, thankfully, food). I expected to find that he was allergic to dogs, cats, pollen, grass, trees, mold, or almost anything! But I was not prepared for eggs.
It is very frustrating to see my son when one of these reactions occur. He is so uncomfortable and I know exactly what he is feeling. It is also frustrating because I did everything in my power to make sure that he wouldn't have any allergies and especially not to food. I nursed exclusively for six months, only adding food to his diet when told they were no longer an issue and one at a time, I continued to nurse (w/o using formula) and am still currently nursing a few times a day. My son didn't have milk until after his first birthday (yet it still seems to irritate his eczema) and we never gave him eggs exclusively. This amazing considering that Easter was the weekend before the tests were done!
The only time that Liam has been exposed to egg at all, is through me and when mixed in a recipe like bread. Now we know that his reactions cohensided with eating those foods that contain egg in the recipe. Because Liam is allergic to eggs and seems to have issues with dairy, his diet is extremely limited. He is already very small and is only in the 8th precentile for weight. All of these things make me very worried about making sure that he has a well-rounded and healthy diet. We know that there are a variety of specialty foods at stores like Whole Foods and New Seasons, but our funds are going to be limited and we really need to find a sustainable way to get him all the nutrients that he needs without breaking the bank. Obviously, we will do whatever we need to do to make sure Liam has what he needs, even if this means no extra money and/or finding a little something extra during my summer breaks. But again, sustainability and a well-rounded, healthy diet are what we are looking for.
We have recently cut out all un-needed expenses: stopped putting money into our 401k, are in the process of canceling comcast cable, phone, and internet, and are trying to pay off a student loan that will free up a little bit of money on a monthly basis. We have also talked about putting in a garden to help with grocery bills and have cut our eating out and costly activities to a minimum. We are not "hurting" for money, in fact right now we are doing just fine. But I will be 1/2 time next year so things will already be a bit tight. I hope I don't sound like I am complaining! Because I am NOT! I'm so excited to be able to be home with my son more and it's a choice that we made as a family, but it will be an adjustment.
So if you have egg/dairy allergies and have any suggestions for us on how to make sure Liam has a healthy diet or know of some good deals, we would love to hear about them!
It is very frustrating to see my son when one of these reactions occur. He is so uncomfortable and I know exactly what he is feeling. It is also frustrating because I did everything in my power to make sure that he wouldn't have any allergies and especially not to food. I nursed exclusively for six months, only adding food to his diet when told they were no longer an issue and one at a time, I continued to nurse (w/o using formula) and am still currently nursing a few times a day. My son didn't have milk until after his first birthday (yet it still seems to irritate his eczema) and we never gave him eggs exclusively. This amazing considering that Easter was the weekend before the tests were done!
The only time that Liam has been exposed to egg at all, is through me and when mixed in a recipe like bread. Now we know that his reactions cohensided with eating those foods that contain egg in the recipe. Because Liam is allergic to eggs and seems to have issues with dairy, his diet is extremely limited. He is already very small and is only in the 8th precentile for weight. All of these things make me very worried about making sure that he has a well-rounded and healthy diet. We know that there are a variety of specialty foods at stores like Whole Foods and New Seasons, but our funds are going to be limited and we really need to find a sustainable way to get him all the nutrients that he needs without breaking the bank. Obviously, we will do whatever we need to do to make sure Liam has what he needs, even if this means no extra money and/or finding a little something extra during my summer breaks. But again, sustainability and a well-rounded, healthy diet are what we are looking for.
We have recently cut out all un-needed expenses: stopped putting money into our 401k, are in the process of canceling comcast cable, phone, and internet, and are trying to pay off a student loan that will free up a little bit of money on a monthly basis. We have also talked about putting in a garden to help with grocery bills and have cut our eating out and costly activities to a minimum. We are not "hurting" for money, in fact right now we are doing just fine. But I will be 1/2 time next year so things will already be a bit tight. I hope I don't sound like I am complaining! Because I am NOT! I'm so excited to be able to be home with my son more and it's a choice that we made as a family, but it will be an adjustment.
So if you have egg/dairy allergies and have any suggestions for us on how to make sure Liam has a healthy diet or know of some good deals, we would love to hear about them!
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Major Accomplishments
As you probably already know, Liam turned one over the weekend. This is a day that I have feared and hoped for, off and on for the past few months. I have feared my son getting bigger and bigger so quickly, but I have hoped for it, because the day would signal the accomplishment of my biggest and most important parenting (and possibly life) goal so far- nursing/pumping for the first year. I tend to be someone who makes goals and follows through sparatically, but when Liam was born, I said that I would do everything in my power to make it nursing exclusively for the first year. When I said this, I was serious about the goal, but still had doubts about my ability to follow through.
Nursing was no problem for the first four months, as I was a stay at home mom over the summer and was always with Liam. The first major hurtle came when I went back to work in September. At that point I talked to a co-worker who is very "nature-focused" and who I thought "If anyone could do it, she could." When I asked her how long she was able to nurse, she said through the first year. Confidience up! But then I asked if she needed to supplement with formula and she said, "Oh ya. There was no way!" Confidience plummeting! I began to doubt my abilities again.
At that point, I said that if I just made it to 6 months I would be happy. October (6 months) came and went and the pumping/nursing was still going strong. Then I said, "Just through the holidays." They came and went and I was beginning to really think that I may have a chance. Then the tough stuff hit. In January, I went back to work after a two week x-mas break and started taking classes for my reading endorsement. The classes required me to work with two students (outside of class time) one on one. The only time this would work was after school and during my prep period (AKA pumping time). At first things were ok, but the further into the calendar year I got, the harder it was. My milk started to stall and not drop soon enough for me to get prepared for the huge group of screaming students to enter my room.
I was so scared that I wouldn't make it after all of this time. Although I knew it wasn't true, I thought that I had gone through all of this trouble for nothing. As spring break approached, I started just hoping to make it until then. With less and less milk, more and more stress, and even less time to pump, it seemed almost impossible. But spring break came and for a whole week Liam and I focused on nursing. The next three weeks were touch and go. Some days were very good and others were so draining that I thought it was over. But here it is, a few days into Liam's second year, and I am still nursing (no longer pumping at work- thank goodness!) and I am so proud of myself. I have NEVER felt so accomplished and I am glad that this is the goal that made it.
*Disclaimer- If you don't want to read about boobies, you should stop reading now!
A friend who is about to welcome her little guy soon, asked if I would post some tips. I don't know how much help they will be, but here they are:
1. Set a good schedule- try to spend as much time nursing exclusely before going to work. I know most people can't help this, but the longer you have, the more your body seems to respond and setting up a good schedule helped me.
2. Don't get frustrated- your milk supply will vary a bit everyday. Some days you will produce a lot and others you won't. Don't dwell on the not so great days, it will all even out if you stick with it.
3. Start pumping and freezing milk ASAP- the more milk in the freezer, the better. If for nothing else, a night out with the hubby.
4. Do whatever you need to do, to be comfortable (with pumping and nursing). Being comfortable and relaxed helps your milk drop quickly and will ensure that your little one won't get frustrated or impatient.
5. Get a good pump. I recommend Medela. When at the hospital, we were told to get a Medela pump. We ignored them thinking they were too expensive. But if you are really committed to this, you will need a good reliable pump and will most likely, eventually go get one anyway. So save yourself the time and money and just get one first.
*The next few tips will be about pumping at work
6. Be honest and straight forward with your boss- it's the law that your boss has to give you a time and place to pump. Use this to your advantage and try to create a plan early.
7. Make sure that your pumping area is comfortable and warm- being cold is not helpful when trying to produce milk and being in a stressful situation doesn't help either. I know this because I had to pump in my classroom (where two walls are windows, one of them to the hallway where students are constantly around).
8. Lock the door! Even with a massive amount of dicussion with my co-workers about what the screen in the corner of the room and lights off means, I still had a couple of almost interruptions (even when the door was locked).
9. Your favorite music and some water to drink can help to set the mood. A comfortable chair and a dark room is a nice way to prepare.
10. Set up a system for getting your pumping equipment to and from work. I took everything with me on Mondays, washed out the pieces after each pumping session, and left the pieces in my classroom until Friday. Then I would take it all home and put it through the dishwasher. To do this, it would be easiest to have two sets of everything (although not financially ideal) pump, cups, tubing, bottles, etc. Leaving one set at home and one at work would relieve a lot of prep and worry. But I wasn't able to do this and had to take the pump itself back and forth.
I hope that these tips are helpful to someone, if not, I tried!
Nursing was no problem for the first four months, as I was a stay at home mom over the summer and was always with Liam. The first major hurtle came when I went back to work in September. At that point I talked to a co-worker who is very "nature-focused" and who I thought "If anyone could do it, she could." When I asked her how long she was able to nurse, she said through the first year. Confidience up! But then I asked if she needed to supplement with formula and she said, "Oh ya. There was no way!" Confidience plummeting! I began to doubt my abilities again.
At that point, I said that if I just made it to 6 months I would be happy. October (6 months) came and went and the pumping/nursing was still going strong. Then I said, "Just through the holidays." They came and went and I was beginning to really think that I may have a chance. Then the tough stuff hit. In January, I went back to work after a two week x-mas break and started taking classes for my reading endorsement. The classes required me to work with two students (outside of class time) one on one. The only time this would work was after school and during my prep period (AKA pumping time). At first things were ok, but the further into the calendar year I got, the harder it was. My milk started to stall and not drop soon enough for me to get prepared for the huge group of screaming students to enter my room.
I was so scared that I wouldn't make it after all of this time. Although I knew it wasn't true, I thought that I had gone through all of this trouble for nothing. As spring break approached, I started just hoping to make it until then. With less and less milk, more and more stress, and even less time to pump, it seemed almost impossible. But spring break came and for a whole week Liam and I focused on nursing. The next three weeks were touch and go. Some days were very good and others were so draining that I thought it was over. But here it is, a few days into Liam's second year, and I am still nursing (no longer pumping at work- thank goodness!) and I am so proud of myself. I have NEVER felt so accomplished and I am glad that this is the goal that made it.
*Disclaimer- If you don't want to read about boobies, you should stop reading now!
A friend who is about to welcome her little guy soon, asked if I would post some tips. I don't know how much help they will be, but here they are:
1. Set a good schedule- try to spend as much time nursing exclusely before going to work. I know most people can't help this, but the longer you have, the more your body seems to respond and setting up a good schedule helped me.
2. Don't get frustrated- your milk supply will vary a bit everyday. Some days you will produce a lot and others you won't. Don't dwell on the not so great days, it will all even out if you stick with it.
3. Start pumping and freezing milk ASAP- the more milk in the freezer, the better. If for nothing else, a night out with the hubby.
4. Do whatever you need to do, to be comfortable (with pumping and nursing). Being comfortable and relaxed helps your milk drop quickly and will ensure that your little one won't get frustrated or impatient.
5. Get a good pump. I recommend Medela. When at the hospital, we were told to get a Medela pump. We ignored them thinking they were too expensive. But if you are really committed to this, you will need a good reliable pump and will most likely, eventually go get one anyway. So save yourself the time and money and just get one first.
*The next few tips will be about pumping at work
6. Be honest and straight forward with your boss- it's the law that your boss has to give you a time and place to pump. Use this to your advantage and try to create a plan early.
7. Make sure that your pumping area is comfortable and warm- being cold is not helpful when trying to produce milk and being in a stressful situation doesn't help either. I know this because I had to pump in my classroom (where two walls are windows, one of them to the hallway where students are constantly around).
8. Lock the door! Even with a massive amount of dicussion with my co-workers about what the screen in the corner of the room and lights off means, I still had a couple of almost interruptions (even when the door was locked).
9. Your favorite music and some water to drink can help to set the mood. A comfortable chair and a dark room is a nice way to prepare.
10. Set up a system for getting your pumping equipment to and from work. I took everything with me on Mondays, washed out the pieces after each pumping session, and left the pieces in my classroom until Friday. Then I would take it all home and put it through the dishwasher. To do this, it would be easiest to have two sets of everything (although not financially ideal) pump, cups, tubing, bottles, etc. Leaving one set at home and one at work would relieve a lot of prep and worry. But I wasn't able to do this and had to take the pump itself back and forth.
I hope that these tips are helpful to someone, if not, I tried!
Monday, April 18, 2011
Dairy of all Kinds
My son had his one year check up today where we were told that he is only in the 8% for weight. He has always been "little", but this is a big change from his last appointment. I have been worried lately about his eating habits. He has been refusing food and not wanting to eat anything except veggie crunchies or goldfish. We have been working on the switch to real food for a couple of weeks and at the beginning he was very receptive and loved eating what mommy and daddy had, but now he refuses everything. This alone would worry me, but we are also going through the process of figuring out whether or not he is allergic to dairy products. He has eczema (thanks to his mommy) that seems to get worse when he eats dairy and recently he is getting a red, itchy rash around his eyes too.
To make things even more interesting, I have stopped pumping at work and we are trying to switch to some other sort of milk (cow's, soy, or rice). Wow! What a wonderful situation! Allergies, food, breast pumps and milk(s). The doctor told us that we should hold off on dairy for a week or two to see if things get better and to use soy milk in the meantime. Then we will try cow's milk again to see if there is a reaction. After having to have a dairy-free diet for just a week, I can't imagine what it would be like for Liam if it were a permanent situation. I had no problems with cravings, it was just so hard to find dairy-free products. Almost everything has dairy-even things you would NEVER think would.
I can't help but be sad that I passed these wonderful genes on to him. I have eczema, asthma, alopecia, thyroid issues, allergies to almost anything natural (except food, thank goodness). I know that at least now, Liam has eczema and it is highly possible that he also has ashma and allergies. So far, no sign of anything else, but it took until I was 5 years old for me. I am trying so hard to think positively, but it is harder and harder the more that comes up. Knowing how hard dealing with all of these issues can be, makes it so difficult for me to be so powerless to help him. I guess that is a lesson for a new mommy- we can't fix everything that they go through.
To make things even more interesting, I have stopped pumping at work and we are trying to switch to some other sort of milk (cow's, soy, or rice). Wow! What a wonderful situation! Allergies, food, breast pumps and milk(s). The doctor told us that we should hold off on dairy for a week or two to see if things get better and to use soy milk in the meantime. Then we will try cow's milk again to see if there is a reaction. After having to have a dairy-free diet for just a week, I can't imagine what it would be like for Liam if it were a permanent situation. I had no problems with cravings, it was just so hard to find dairy-free products. Almost everything has dairy-even things you would NEVER think would.
I can't help but be sad that I passed these wonderful genes on to him. I have eczema, asthma, alopecia, thyroid issues, allergies to almost anything natural (except food, thank goodness). I know that at least now, Liam has eczema and it is highly possible that he also has ashma and allergies. So far, no sign of anything else, but it took until I was 5 years old for me. I am trying so hard to think positively, but it is harder and harder the more that comes up. Knowing how hard dealing with all of these issues can be, makes it so difficult for me to be so powerless to help him. I guess that is a lesson for a new mommy- we can't fix everything that they go through.
Sunday, April 17, 2011
Parties and Steps
Today was Liam's first birthday party. Because it's April, the weather is unpredictable, and we invited upwards of 60 people, we decided to have his party at the local YMCA. His party was wonderful and full of love and fun. He was so happy the whole time! I don't think that it was the gifts or the cake that he found so exciting, but the attention and support that he felt from everyone who was there. We were all so happy to be there and everyone truely wanted to celebrate him and the day that he became a part of our lives. I realized that this is the most important thing that we can hope for, for his future- people who care about him and are happy to be there for him in celebration and in sadness. I realized just how many of those people we have around us and how important they are to our health and happiness. This list is not limited to only the people who attended the party, but extend for miles.
Although, a first birthday party may seem like a big enough "step" in one's life for one day, Liam doesn't roll that way! He decided to starting walking too. He took his first steps about a month ago, but actually began to take more than one or two steps at a time and is looking sturdier and sturdier. I am so proud of him and his accomplishments, but I know that this is one that will have lasting consequences for mommy and daddy. Today was a busy, happy day, but it also brought a surge of calm and excitment for the future. I believe that I am starting to see things more clearly and that the things that should be focused on are coming to light more and more each day. It is so easy to get caught up in things that don't really matter, but today was what life is all about. Family, friends, celebration, and growth, what else could you ask for?
Although, a first birthday party may seem like a big enough "step" in one's life for one day, Liam doesn't roll that way! He decided to starting walking too. He took his first steps about a month ago, but actually began to take more than one or two steps at a time and is looking sturdier and sturdier. I am so proud of him and his accomplishments, but I know that this is one that will have lasting consequences for mommy and daddy. Today was a busy, happy day, but it also brought a surge of calm and excitment for the future. I believe that I am starting to see things more clearly and that the things that should be focused on are coming to light more and more each day. It is so easy to get caught up in things that don't really matter, but today was what life is all about. Family, friends, celebration, and growth, what else could you ask for?
Saturday, April 16, 2011
On a Speeding Train
Today is my son's first birthday! One year ago today, I met the LOVE of my life. When that day began, I had no idea what I was getting myself into. I knew that I would love the little person who had been growing in my belly, and I knew that my life would never be the same. But the meaning behind these words is not even close to describing what happened the moment that I looked in to my little man's eyes. I heard the song "Beautiful Boy" by John Lennon the second I saw him and the words in that song describe so much of what I feel. My life is so different and I would not change one single thing about it! My life before Liam was wonderful and perfect for who I was then, but my life would no longer be complete without him. In fact, he IS my life now and I am so proud of that!
When I was pregnant I knew that things would change and that I would "miss out" on some of the things that I enjoyed, now I know that what has changed is me and what I now enjoy. Making my son laugh, watching him learn, seeing him sleep, and coming home to his excited panting and reaching is now all I want. This has been the case for a whole year now and I can't believe it. There are times when it feels like Liam has been here forever and I can't remember who I was before him, and then there are times when the day he was born seems as if it were yesterday. Today, I have experienced both feelings multiple times.
It is the most amazing and sad feeling to be at this point. Amazing because I love who he is becoming and what he has done to change me, and sad because I am not ready for him to grow up and it is happening right before my eyes. Being a parent is the hardest, scariest, and most rewarding thing that I have and will ever do and I am so proud of how naturally my husband and I have fallen into the jobs. I know that I will and have already made many mistakes, but we are learning fast and my son's happy, calm demeanor tells me we are doing something right. Everyone (even strangers) comment about how happy and relaxed he is and although I can't take full credit, I know that the way we are with him has something to do with that. As we put my son to bed tonight, I couldn't help but get teary-eyed and be a little sad that the first year of his life is already over, but I know that if he has improved our lives this much in one year, just imagine how happy we will be when he is grown. I love you more than anyone and anything my sweet boy!
When I was pregnant I knew that things would change and that I would "miss out" on some of the things that I enjoyed, now I know that what has changed is me and what I now enjoy. Making my son laugh, watching him learn, seeing him sleep, and coming home to his excited panting and reaching is now all I want. This has been the case for a whole year now and I can't believe it. There are times when it feels like Liam has been here forever and I can't remember who I was before him, and then there are times when the day he was born seems as if it were yesterday. Today, I have experienced both feelings multiple times.
It is the most amazing and sad feeling to be at this point. Amazing because I love who he is becoming and what he has done to change me, and sad because I am not ready for him to grow up and it is happening right before my eyes. Being a parent is the hardest, scariest, and most rewarding thing that I have and will ever do and I am so proud of how naturally my husband and I have fallen into the jobs. I know that I will and have already made many mistakes, but we are learning fast and my son's happy, calm demeanor tells me we are doing something right. Everyone (even strangers) comment about how happy and relaxed he is and although I can't take full credit, I know that the way we are with him has something to do with that. As we put my son to bed tonight, I couldn't help but get teary-eyed and be a little sad that the first year of his life is already over, but I know that if he has improved our lives this much in one year, just imagine how happy we will be when he is grown. I love you more than anyone and anything my sweet boy!
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